I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
last night I used snow as a chaser
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
