I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
you made out with another girl for some wings
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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