we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
We're hate flirting, damnit.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
