im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
