how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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