you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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