I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize