O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize