Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
