i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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