literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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