My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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