thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
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and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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