i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
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