Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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