I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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