i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Drake has all the answers
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize