dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
