He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
