Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i came on her dog
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
