I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize