He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
