please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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