ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
