This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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