remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
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