I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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