Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.

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  (407): Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer. http://tfl.nu/hnl7
  Replies (5) Good night (1468) Bad night (2827)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  we have officially lost it.

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  (713): we have officially lost it. http://tfl.nu/v1jx
  Replies (3) Good night (1107) Bad night (490)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.

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  (304): I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine. http://tfl.nu/cm6i
  Replies (49) Good night (700) Bad night (6197)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.

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  (720): If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend. http://tfl.nu/by48
  Replies (24) Good night (702) Bad night (3693)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?

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  (785): Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ? http://tfl.nu/syfm
  Replies (10) Good night (684) Bad night (4042)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...

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  (270): The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips... http://tfl.nu/unl6
  Replies (8) Good night (5236) Bad night (1405)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?

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  (+44): Hey, did you take me to hospital last night? http://tfl.nu/iu9j
  Replies (9) Good night (1594) Bad night (2191)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off

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  (407): Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off http://tfl.nu/jc13
  Replies (13) Good night (868) Bad night (3772)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.

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  (713): We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager. http://tfl.nu/qy4e
  Replies (11) Good night (2502) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.

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  (502): New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday. http://tfl.nu/wghi
  Replies (6) Good night (2000) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision

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  (631): Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision http://tfl.nu/3v04
  Replies (24) Good night (1364) Bad night (2534)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"

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  (508): Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!" http://tfl.nu/hrv9
  Replies (6) Good night (2058) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels

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  (303): im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels http://tfl.nu/5yvq
  Replies (4) Good night (1802) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.

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  (816): Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays. http://tfl.nu/c3h2
  Replies (11) Good night (3018) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.

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  (+61): Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer. http://tfl.nu/u2pr
  Replies (2) Good night (347) Bad night (210)

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