All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Randomize
