WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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