I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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