Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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