I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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