At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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