How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
