Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize