worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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