Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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