Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
