i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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