I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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