p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize