Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
