Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."