I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
