you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize