:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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