I didn't shave. On purpose
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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