I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
