Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize