I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
