Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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