i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
